I tend to forget that there is so much more to reality than what I can see. When nothing will go the way I intend and I can't seem to do anything the right way and kids seem purposefully awful and everything is just a mess, there truly is more going on than can be seen with human eyes. There are battles everyday. We know Who prevails in the end but the battle for hearts still takes a toll on the lives we lead.
I've realized recently that calm waters isn't all it's cracked up to be. I'm noticing that the waves and the storms that make me cling to Him for dear life have much more use than the hypnotizing facade of floating along all unruffled. If I'm skating by under the radar and Satan has no reason to want to mess with me, then I'm doing something wrong. If I'm doing a good enough job at tearing down my own home that the father of lies doesn't need to assist, I'm in a very dangerous place.
There are times when these battles will be worse than others. The times when we are most vulnerable are usually the times where our intentions are the best, when there is the possibility of furthering His kingdom. The times we can't seem to get it right are usually the times we most need to. So when a child of God steps out, dressed in His armor, intent to see the battle through to the end, she better be ready for what is thrust her way.
To be ready she must be strong. The spirit needs training just as the body does. Bodies get soft when they sit idle. So, too, the spirit grows weak when allowed to be lazy.
So I'm writing to remind myself just what is at stake and why it's been so hard lately. I've been trying to contend all naked and hungry. I'll suit up. I'll pray. I'll fast. I'll live off His word. I'm stepping out. Since I know for Whom I fight, I know it's a battle I will win.