I can be joyful at the same time I am hurting. I can be humbly grateful and painfully resentful, maybe not simultaneously, but within minutes my mind can take me from one extreme emotion to the other.
It's not just the emotions that are tangled either. It's the thoughts and plans; it's the mothering and teaching. It's all the tasks and all the love that are all so intertwined sometimes it can be overwhelming to figure out just what I feel or what needs to be done.
So I write.
The writing takes the tangle and unwinds it into a linear train of thought. Writing helps me find the way through the maze. It doesn't matter how scattered the words may be, I can only write one word at a time. One letter behind the next. These words turn sentences that give way to paragraphs and suddenly things make a little more sense.
Words have always been good friends of mine. Whether they were printed on a page or scratched down by my pen, they have always been close by, always there when I needed them. Story books, novels, plays, diaries, poems, songs, journals...all there to give me focus.
This love affair of mine (yes, so really they are much more than good friends) with the written word gives me a glimmer of insight into the Word Himself. God makes us in His image, with the ability to create, to tell stories, to give comfort and peace with our words. It is because I am made in that image that I am able to express the convoluted mosaic that is my mind in these nice neat sentences. God made His Word flesh. He spoke with words and created the universe. How closely related WORDS are to to the giving of LIFE. That's my hope, that my little words, blessed by Him, can bring honor, give comfort and peace to whomever happens to read them, even if that's just me.
I like this writing space, this little blog of mine. It's not here to gain a whole bunch of readers (though it's so lovely to hear from those of you who follow along!). It's not here to make any money. It's a place where I can breath deep and go through my thoughts, one at a time. It's where in the image of my Maker, I create, I write. It is where I share my words and with them my life.